


Fracture Lines

by Jena Bartley (jenab)



Category: The Border (TV)
Genre: Episode Related, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-18
Updated: 2009-12-18
Packaged: 2017-10-04 14:06:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/31037
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jenab/pseuds/Jena%20Bartley
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Decisions made and the reverberations of them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fracture Lines

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Maekala](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maekala/gifts).



Spoilers up to Kiss and Cry, third season

 

"Good night, boss."

Mike looked up to see Maggie standing in his office doorway. Behind her he could see the rest of the team rising from their desks as they prepared to leave. Through the windows, he could see the sun starting to set over Lake Ontario, making him realize how late it had gotten.

"Good night, Maggie. See you tomorrow."

Maggie eyed him carefully, no doubt taking in the crumbled dress shirt, dark shadows under his eyes, and the fact he'd been in the office before she even arrived this morning. "Go home, boss. You look like hell."

Mike smiled at her. "I will soon. I just have a bit more paperwork to finish before I leave tonight."

Maggie looked right back at him, concern clear in her eyes. Mike held her gaze, ignoring the twinge of pain from the knife wound and the way his shoulder still felt stiff from being shot. As if she could sense that, Maggie's eyes narrowed in an expression Mike knew all to well. Maggie in mother-hen mode could be as terrifying as her in the tough-as-nails interrogator mode.

"Go home, Maggie. I'll leave shortly."

Maggie sighed and threw her hands up in the air. "All right."

As she left his office, Mike could see Moose and Darnell joining her at the exit. Slade was still in his office, fingers flying across his keyboard as he worked. Khali was at her desk, probably going over her report before she handed into him. Across her desk, Gray stared at his computer.

Mike returned to his pile of never ending paperwork. Being shot months ago followed by the knifing in Kabul had made the paperwork pile up high. Plus, the defecting freedom fighter slash figure skater from China only resulted in the work growing higher.

By the time he'd gotten the pile down to a much more manageable level, the sun had set and the Toronto skyline was in full nighttime mode. The rest of the office was on nighttime settings, leaving ICS dark and deserted looking except for one bright desk lamp.

Gray Jackson still sat at his desk, the computer monitor casting shadows across his face. Mike took a couple of pain pills and sat back in his chair, watching his agent.

Gray looked haunted. His shoulders had a rounded slump to them, and his walk lacked its usual swagger. The cocky, confidant agent Mike had mentored and brought on board had disappeared under this new, haunted and angry version. Layla and Dougie Jackson's deaths plus Gray's own actions had left him looking lost and alone, shoulders slumped down by his decisions. Along with all the doubts and what ifs now running through his mind, as well as the hostility and distrust from his team mates and allies weighed him down. Only time would tell if that would change, and if Gray could make amends not only to the team but to himself as well.

Mike didn't know if he could forgive Gray for what he did. The anger had now faded from the burning rage of months ago, leaving him feeling betrayed and hurt.

He'd mentored Gray, trusted him as deeply as he did Maggie and the others. Gray had even offered to put his life and career on the line to protect Mike a few times over the years. It hurt that Gray hadn't even come to him for help instead of sinking deeper and deeper into his father's problems until they became his own along with ICS. If only he'd come to Mike earlier, things wouldn't have gotten so out of hand. He wouldn't have damaged Mike's trust and respect for him.

Why hadn't Gray come to him, trusted him to help his agent out? Yes, Mike would have been disappointed and furious that Gray had let this happened. Especially after struggling for years to get clean from his own gambling addiction, and get his life back on track. That was what Mike couldn't understand. How could Gray get so deep in trouble and not even reach out when Mike had asked him what was happening with him months ago?

Mike was also angry at himself. He'd seen how distracted Gray had become. How he seemed to be spiraling more out of control over the past weeks leading up to Layla and his father's deaths alongside the shoot-out that left Mike and several other agents wounded. Hell, even Maggie had seen it, coming to Mike to see what they should do. He should have pushed his agent harder for answers. Instead, he trusted Gray would eventually come to him before it got too bad for him to handle. He was responsible as Gray for how this entire mess had turned out. A good agent dead, another agent's career in tatters.

He reached for his suit jacket, shrugging it on, ignoring the way his body ached. He really should have gone home hours ago. With Zoe gone, the apartment felt too empty without her chatter and stuff taking over everything. Now, however he left the apartment in the morning it was exactly the same way when he came home at night. He missed her and the various ways she both infuriated him with her actions, and made him love and respect her when she took a stand. No matter how much Mike hated what she was supporting at times or how she couldn't see that he was trying in his own way to make Canada a better place with his job.

Turning out the office lights, he made his way to the exit. In the reflection of the glass doors, he watched Gray at his desk and sighed. Mike also worried about Gray. About who would have his back now that Layla was dead and the team no longer trusted him. He feared that Gray's guilt and self loathing would eat at him until he got careless on a mission and let himself be killed.

He turned away from the exit and made his way to Gray's desk. Gray looked up, dark shadows under his eyes not quite hidden by the desk lamp.

"Boss?"

Mike studied him for a long moment. Gray met his gaze, not quite backing down at whatever he saw there.

"Go home. You're no good to anyone if you keep this up. Whatever you're working on can wait till tomorrow."

He didn't wait for Gray's response before turning to leave.

"What can I do to make up for this?"

Mike stopped, staring out over the Toronto skyline. He sighed and ran his hand through his hair before looking back at Gray.

The anguish and grief were etched deep in Gray's eyes and posture, everything about him screaming contrition. Mike let it roll off him, still not able to forgive him yet for his massive screw-up.

"Do your job, don't screw up again. Only time can fix this. You need to work to make the others trust you again and to forgive you. And you will need to find a way to forgive yourself for what happened. "

"And if I can't fix this, what then?"

"We'll deal with it if it comes to that."

Mike turned and walked away, unable to provide the reassurance Gray needed. Too much between them now, too many mistakes and dead bodies for Mike to trust Gray easily again.

**Author's Note:**

> This story just flowed out of me. It is something that lurked in the back of my mind since season three began and I don't think I would have ever thought to write it before Yuletide came around. When I got my assignment and read your letter the story jumped right to the forefront of my mind. I had a great time writing this and I hope you enjoy it.


End file.
